SPRINGBOARD CONNECTIONS

Grief & Loss During the Holidays: 3 tips that won't fail

Be sure to check out the inner peace for the holidays link below.

When you have experienced loss and are in transition, the holidays can be especially challenging. What can you do to make your holiday season more enjoyable? Unless you are among a very small minority, spending the holidays alone isn't a good choice! You know that, right?

Here are three tips I am sharing with you because I know they always work for me.

1. Make plans ahead of time.  2. Make it fun and worthwhile.  3. And, have a backup plan, just in case! 

You do not have to spend the holidays alone. While it may not always be possible to be with your regular family/friends, there are a host of other things that can make your day fun and rewarding. But it takes some advance-work.

My first holiday alone, my girlfriend and I traveled up to the Sierra's and loaded the back of my pickup high with fresh white snow, drove down to the city and deposited it on another friend's lawn to surprise her young children. With blue skies in the valley they were the only family who had a snowman in their front yard. And I had a blast, got good exercise, and taking my new puppy along was frosting on the cake.

That is just one idea, what have you done that works? Share in the comment section below so we can all learn from each other. And,  I have a special treat for you.

I have scheduled Mary Allen, America's Inner Peace Coach, to be my guest when I host Springboard Conversations this month. She is full of wisdom and practical tips. Her subject: Inner Peace. To register, click on the blue link below.

Expand your joy and inner peace during this holiday season.

Inner Peace

Wednesday December 8, 2010 at 5pm PST and 8pm EST

Our inner peace is always there, it just isn't always easy to find! Unless, of course, you have the tools that Coach Mary can give you that can help you return to inner peace at any time - no matter the situation.

 

"Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work.  It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart."  - Author Unknown

 

Available Now:  Guidebooks  - just click on guidebooks to read a sample.

Guidebooks for woman reclaiming their lives after loss.

1)  From Grief to Joy: The Path of Tranisition. Learn to move more powerfully through the sadness of loss.

2)  If You Can See It You Can Do It: Living the Power of Vision. Clarify and connect with your passion. Create a vision of the future

3)  Living Your Life Design: Choice not Chance. Put your vision into action. Embrace your new life.

 Happy Holidays and many warm wishes, Marlene

 

 

Experiencing sadness? Try this.

I get quotes from various sources sent to my email box every morning.Today this quote by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe reminded me about what I know works to help me start my day in a more positive and creative way.

A woman should hear a little music, read a little poetry and see a find picture ever day of her life, in order that worldy cares not obliterate the sense of the beautiful that God has implanted in the human soul. (pronouns adjusted)

It is said the the power of gratitude unleases abundance and happiness in our life.  I have found that to be true.  Have you? I know when I spend a few quiet moments in the morning reflecting on all the things for which I am grateful my day goes much better.  In fact, I experience a more positive mood that lasts throughout my day. I notice that I even approach my work with more creativity.  If I am feeling sad, my heart lightens and i feel more optimistic.

What do you do in the morning to help lift your mood and add to your daily experience of life?  Share your answers in the comments below.  I am always pleased to read your responses.

Make this your best day yet.

Listening to Our Bodies, They Know More than We Do!

The body holds much of the information we need to function at our best, but too often we ignore its messages and plow ahead with what our minds tell us. Perhaps because we’re not taught from early on to pay attention to internal messages as well as   external demands, we frequently ignore our body’s communications.

So we take another extra-strength aspirin rather than investigating what’s causing our head to ache. We use more caffeine or sugar to give us a lift when we feel tired, rather than hearing our body’s message about needing rest or recognizing our fatigue as an early symptom of burnout we’d do well to heed. I can identify, can you? A look at our pets may be all the message we need about the value of naps.

We fail to take into account the thousand little messages communicated to us by how we’re holding ourselves: the mouth that’s pinched and tight rather than relaxed. The fact that our shoulders are up around our ears, the knot of tension in our stomach as we promise to do something when closer consideration might tell us we are already over-extended.

These days we’re notorious for putting deadlines ahead of the protests of aching bones or inadequately nourished bellies. (Is there hidden wisdom in calling a due date a deadline in the first place?) Instead of asking our body what it wants, we go for the quick fill-up or the comfort food that may be the last thing we really need.

So what can you do to give your body an equal say in how you use it?

Start with the breath. Breathing consciously is a major part of body awareness. Turn off thoughts and just let yourself experience the inflow and outflow of breath. Label them, “In. Out. In. Out.” Note how and where you are breathing or failing to, a clear sign something important is going on.

Allow yourself quiet time. Sit for ten minutes just observing yourself, even (especially!) in the middle of a busy day. Meditate. Take a walk or a nap. Allow time to do nothing. Soak in a hot tub rather than taking a quick shower.

Get a massage. It’s not self-indulgence to be massaged; it wakes up the whole nervous system and helps you tune in.

Use your journal to dialog with your body. Ask your body how it’s feeling, what it wants, what’s going on. Give that sore wrist or stiff lower back a voice and let it tell you what its message is.

Eat when hungry, sleep when tired. Take a week and really pay attention to your body’s most basic needs. Do your real rhythms for eating and sleeping conform to the habits you’ve established? If they don’t, change them!

Do a body inventory to relax. Start with your toes and work upwards. Scan your body from the inside. Or try tensing each part slightly, then relaxing it to release residual tension.

Practice mindfulness. Get used to tuning in to your physical self, wherever you are, whatever you’re doing.

And if your body suggests rolling down a grassy hillside, taking flight on a playground swing, or skipping down a winding path, why resist? Its impulses hold the key to our well-being!

Let's commit to learning how to better listen to our bodies and to how they can help us become healthier and more content.

Wishing you a great week!

Closing the Gap

Going From Where You Are To Where You Want To Be Without Getting Derailed

It's not too late to join our free teleclass

for Thursday, September 23, 2010 at 5pm PT

 

• Is life moving too fast?
• Has change turned your world upside down?
• Are ready to clarify your strengths, recognize your unique purpose and move forward with renewed energy?
• Do you want a greater sense of freedom, satisfaction and fulfillment in your life?

Register Here

If you are like many of us your life is going and changing faster than you feel you can keep up with. And while you have accomplished a lot there is still a vague feeling of unrest, maybe frustration even resignation

Or perhaps significant change has occurred in your life and you are wondering what the best thing to do next is? Or you plans have stalled and you wonder if you’ll ever accomplish those things you hold to be most important

 

What you will learn:

·     How to be in clear action instead of time-wasting reaction

·     How to make your thinking/thoughts work for you instead of against you

·     What is the Pivotal question you need to ask to find clarity and to stay on track

 

These are the mid-life years when we find ourselves changing along with everything else around us. Some things we need to let go of, other things we need to keep and there are still those things we want to accomplish.

 

We all know that change and transition are a natural part of life. The trick is to learn how to use change in a way that helps us move forward feeling a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment.

 

Registere Here

 

Change comes to us planned and unplanned. Join us next week and learn tips on how to manage change and use it to propell you to your new future. 

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?

“The arrival of a good clown into a village does more for its health than 20 asses laden with drugs,” observed Thomas Sydenham, a seventeenth century British physician, who may have been the first doctor to recommend laughter as the best medicine.

We can all identify with the good feeling that comes from having a good session of laughing – made even richer by being with friends. Now research is showing the tremendous value of laughter and experts are taking the benefits of laughter seriously. Did you know that three minutes of deep belly laughing is the equivalent of three minutes on a fitness rowing machine?

Nowadays, not only is it common knowledge that laughter has all sorts of physical and mental health benefits, there’s even an organization called the Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor, which is made up of more than 600 doctors and healthcare professionals who study the effects of humor on humans. Here’s what they are discovering.

1. Laughter decrease stress hormones

2. Laughter increases the activity of natural killer cells that go after tumor cells

3. It’s been shown to also boost the immune system

4. Laughing increases your heart rate, blood flow to brain, respiratory rate, and your lungs expand – almost like jogging only you don’t have to leave the house!

5. Laughter increases your alertness, memory, and your ability to learn and create by increasing the production of catecholmanines.

6. Deep down belly Laughter releases anti-depressant mood chemicals.

So with all their prods and wires and gizmos and gauges, professionals are telling us what we knew all along: when we laugh we feel better.

And there are other benefits as well. Laughter is good social glue. It connects us to others and counteracts feelings of alienation and helps us feel more connected.

Want to be more creative? Try laughing more. Humor loosens up the mental gears and encourages looking at things from a different, out-of-the-ordinary perspective.

Besides spackling together our conversations and relieving tension, humor and laughter are coping mechanisms. They provide distance and perspective when situation are otherwise horrible. Laughter is one way to dissipate hurt and pain.

So how do we inoculate ourselves with laughter?

Humor guru William Fry, M.D. professor emeritus of psychiatry at Stanford University recommends this two-step process.

1. Figure out what makes you laugh – your humor profile by listening to yourself for a few days to see what makes you laugh out loud. Do your heartiest guffaws come from watching Moe, Larry and Curly? Or to you respond to more sophisticated French farces?

 2. Then start building your own humor library: books, videos, movies etc. If possible, have a special corner to house your collection. Then, when life gets you down, don’t hesitate to visit. “Even a few minutes of Laughter will provide some value.

So what makes you laugh? For me, I like to watch America’s Funniest Home Videos. As silly as some of them can be, I find myself laughing out loud - - and it feels good.

The Power of Self Care During Loss and Change

Just like a broken leg needs a cast, your body needs its own "cast" of good self-care.

When you're going through significant change such as a loss, taking extra care of yourself is one of best things you can do. Now is the time to put yourself first, to do the things you need to do to stay healthy. Often there are others to think about as well, but if we are not healthy we can’t be as helpful as we want. On an airplane we are told that when the oxygen masks fall, put one on yourself before you help someone else. We are no good to anyone if we don’t preserve our own health.

The stress of loss and change can cause illness, but you can protect yourself by practicing self-care. Some ways to do this are:

· Connect with other people who have experienced a similar loss, tapping into the healing power of connection. We are not meant to be alone through such times. Group support during rough times has been practiced through the ages. Find a safe place to receive support and to be supportive of others.

 

· Establish some easy self-care practices such as practicing breathing exercises, walking, sitting in the sun or drinking fresh water. Harness the power of nature through water, fresh air and visual beauty—this works to support the healing process and to bolster our immune processes.

 

Fortunately, our body is an amazing thing. "When an emotional injury takes place, the body begins a process as natural as the healing of a physical wound. Let the process happen. Trust the process. Surrender to it."—Colgrove, Bloomfield and McWilliams.

Just like a broken leg needs a cast, your body needs its own "cast" of good self-care. Practicing easy self-care techniques releases the body's natural healing powers. In addition, the support and love of a group sustains you in ways that are hard to find anywhere else.

Our bodies are remarkable, aren't they? What are some things you have done or are doing to take extra care of yourself? We can always learn from each other.

 

The Good News about Grief

Are you experiencing the pain of loss? Are you trying to move forward regardless of how you are feeling? Are you holding back your tears for fear if you cry you will never stop?

I have some good news for you. Grieving is the body’s healthy response to loss. By letting yourself experience your pain you are actually doing the best thing you can for yourself. You are allowing the body to begin the natural process of healing. By grieving you actually lessen your time of sadness.

"Amidst the worldly comings and goings, observe how endings become beginnings." - Tao Te Ching

Right after a significant loss you may feel numb. During this early period there are often many things to attend to and decisions to make that keep your mind occupied and away from feeling the pain of your loss.  Although it may be possible to postpone your grieving, it is not possible to postpone it altogether. If your life was too busy for you to stop and feel the grief of your loss, you can expect it to eventually erupt sometime in the future.

It is important to know you are okay even when you feel so bad. It is common to want to resist feelings that make us feel bad. It may even seem counter-intuitive to let these emotions flow. But that is exactly the best thing to do. The common saying that "time heals" is a little misleading. It is what you do with the time that really counts. "When an emotional injury takes place, the body begins a process as natural as the healing of a physical wound. Let the process happen. Trust the process.” Colgrove

Our emotions of grief are the body’s way of healing. Learning how to be with your memories and taking the time to grieve your loss will bring you the peace and healing for which you yearn.

Recommended reading for those you have suffered a personal loss.

1)    Colgrove’s little book is easy to read. A phrase, a paragraph or a page seems to have just the right words of encouragement.

How to Survive the Loss of a Love. Colgrove, Ph.D., M., Bloomfield, M.D. H., & McWilliams, P

2)    Coming in June three guidebooks for those rebuilding their lives after loss

In these guidebooks you will find supportive information, success stories, humor and actions you can take to support your healing and to create the life you desire.

1)    Taming the Memory; 2) If You Can See It You Can Do it; 3) Living Your Life Design
 
As a coach, I work with women rebuilding their lives after personal loss. I will help you understand your feelings and navigate your way through the pain of loss. I will support you in making peace with the past and in realizing a new, abundant way of living. You will find new energy, courage and hope. I am dedicated to working with you to discover the new gifts life is waiting to offer you. 

You can connect with me by email at coach@marlenelockwood.com. Please visit my website www.marlenelockwood.com to read more about the services I offer.

I want to share something remarkable with you today

Every now and then a book comes along that profoundly impacts readers to such an extent that it serves as a tipping point in the evolution of human consciousness. It brings me great joy and excitement to share such a book with you today.

Never before has a book been written that shares the true-life stories of ordinary men and women from around the world who have experienced hearing God's Voice. When God Spoke to Me: The Inspiring Stories Of Ordinary People Who Have Received Divine Guidance and Wisdom will not only move you to see life from a new perspective, it's filled with such raw and captivating authenticity and emotion that it's causing a tremendous stir amongst ministers, professors, and readers from all walks of life.

Click Here to Learn More and Experience It Now

"This book is delightful because it confirms that all of us can speak with the Divine. In these stories we hear regular people and how their lives shift because of their connection to God. It is very inspiring!" Mariel Hemingway, Actress, Author of Mariel's Kitchen

"I loved this book! I told all the ministers who graduated from seminary with me to read it. These heartwarming stories brought me to tears, not tears of sadness, but tears of joy knowing that the tangible love and presence of God is with us always." Rev. Brad Langdon, Unity Church of Anderson, Indiana

"This inspiring book is a rich storehouse of stories of people who—in the midst of addiction, grief, anger, rebellion, loneliness, and many other situations that afflict us all—have heard the voice of a God who can restore and renew. These testimonies are the best evidence we can hope for that the Ancient of Days is still transforming lives in the 21st century!" Richard Mouw, President & Professor of Christian Philosophy, Fuller Theological Seminary

When God Spoke to Me marks the beginning of a new era—an era that openly acknowledges that God speaks to all of us, in countless different ways, regardless of our personal struggles, our backgrounds, or our faith. I strongly encourage you to click one of the links on this page to learn more about this fascinating book. It promises to be one of the most inspiring, life-changing books you'll ever read.

P.S. Be sure to forward this e-mail to your family and friends. Free Brand New Apple iPads and many other valuable gifts are being given away as part of the book's initial worldwide release.

 

Visit www.WhenGodSpokeToMe.com to Learn More and
Experience It Now

Take your life from ambition to meaning -

I've dedicated this blog post to tell you about a great new book that I think you maight enjoy.

The book isThe Shift by Dr. Wayne Dyer.

Dr. Wayne Dyer helps you take your life from ambition to meaning with the companion book to the movie, The Shift.

In The Shift—a companion book to the movie of the same name—New York Times best-selling author Dr. Wayne W. Dyer illustrates how and why to make the move in your life from ambition to meaning.

Such a shift eliminates our feelings of separateness, illuminates our spiritual connectedness, and involves moving from the ego-directed morning into the afternoon of life where everything is primarily influenced by purpose.

Purchase The Shift and download a free 2-hour online lecture from Wayne Dyer and Hay House! You can also enter to win a trip to MAUI for Wayne Dyer's Mastering the Art of Manifestation weekend workshop, October 23-24, 2010.

Additional Details: http://promos.hayhouse.com/theshift/

Wow, now that’s a win!

Did you watch the German speedskater Anni Friesinger-Postman take that spill during the women’s team pursuit semifinal?

According to the news from Toronto, Anna continued the race even after her skate broke in the final lap. As her skate wobbled beneath her she stumbled then fell headfirst onto the ice. Then she slid over the finish line on her stomach in the women’s team pursuit semifinal.

“ Banging the ice in fury and lying face down on the surface of the Richmond Olympic Oval, Friesinger-Postma eventually glanced up at the scoreboard and realized her misfortune did not matter — with the Germans having squeezed home by six-hundredths of a second.”

It was reported that Anni was smart enough to swing her skate around and get it over the line just in time.

Her teammates said Anni’s fall and her courage to keep focused on the finish line gave them all courage to go on – eventually winning a gold medal

That kind of courage and commitment takes my breath away. How about you?